Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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