before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize