Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
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