"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
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