i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Randomize
