Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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