Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
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