Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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