Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
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