when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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