i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
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