if i can run in heels then i can drive
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
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