Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
