I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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