bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Randomize
