so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
