I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize
