I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
