that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize