It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
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