quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Randomize