Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I deserve this hangover.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
