i just google imaged poop.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
