he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize