Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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