You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
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