PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
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Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
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Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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