I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize