This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
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