yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
