Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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