Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
