it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
