My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
