three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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