Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
