I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
