Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy