next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT