I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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