the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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