TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
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