why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize