How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize