Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Randomize
