Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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