ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
