seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have beer where we have blood.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
my liver is dry heaving
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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