She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
