last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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