ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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