You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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